I finished Valve’s Portal a few weeks ago and now share my praise and criticism. First, the praise:
- The unique concept. I have never been an avid gamer but have played enough to have noticed. Here’s a wonderful excerpt from the dialogue:
…speedy thing goes in; speedy thing comes out.
- The black humour. Although I am naturally more inclined to enjoy sarcasm and black humour than others seem to be, I am confident that most players would appreciate it—albeit not as much. GLaDOS and the wall scribbles are particularly amusing.
- The atmosphere. The combination of higher‐level thought requirements, sound effects, and graphics immersed me more than almost any game. (Metroid Prime is a particularly notable exception)
- The puzzles. I’ve never been opposed to puzzles in video games but usually avoid them because they are utterly terrible. The press‐the‐levers‐in‐the‐right‐order and go‐find‐the‐key “puzzles” are irritating; I am concerned that they are only placed in games because the developers feel puzzles are a requirement (though they are not). Portal is the first game I bought explicitly for its puzzle‐based nature.
Now the criticism:
- The puzzles (revisited). I bought Portal for its puzzle‐based nature but was mildly disappointed with the puzzles. They’re certainly unique—and actually are puzzles—, but they are simpler than I had hoped. The bonus rounds (altered versions of the early areas) are not much better: the usual change is toxic soup below the map, so you die if you fall. The puzzles are simpler than I thought after watching friends play it.
- The toxic soup. WFFSMNADHAED is with that? Who thought of that? Puzzles are fun, but jumping between platforms while praying to the FSM that you do not fall into the toxic soup is not; I did not buy Portal to play a Mario rip‐off with better graphics but grossly inferior and more annoying platforms.
- The length. Games should last longer than my dog’s walk (given, my dog walks about 2 km/hr).
I was impressed by Portal and enjoyed it. My expectations of its puzzles’ complexities were shot down, but it was nonetheless worth playing, even only for its uniqueness and black humour.
Tags: black, GLaDOS, portal, puzzles, review, valve, very long acronyms